Matt Lauer earned every bit of his reported $16 million salary at NBC's "Today" show yesterday as he kept his cool with the laughable and slappable Dina Lohan.
The 47-year-old momager is so in denial about her hospitalized daughter/client Lindsay that she either lied to Lauer about how many times Lindsay has been in rehab - or she's lost count.
"This is the fourth time ..." started Lauer.
"No, actually, not ... " Dina cut in.
"How many times has she been in rehab?" he asked.
"Two," pronounced Dina.
"My notes had four."
"No, I don't know where you're reading this."
Later, Lauer pressed again: "You said this is her second stint, but she was in Wonderland ... in Promises ... in Cirque Lodge ... and now UCLA. This is the fourth time she's been in some kind of rehab."
"Oh. You said court-ordered," Dina lied, or denied.
"That's a lot of times to be in and out without some sort of success," Lauer said.
"What do you mean by 'success'"?
Um, how about not getting busted for drunken driving with cocaine in your pocket two weeks after getting out of Promises, as the "Freaky Friday" star did in July 2007? Rehab might have been more successful earlier that year if Dina hadn't brought an "Entertainment Tonight" camera crew along on her visit to Lindsay.
"Clearly, rehab didn't work," Lauer said.
"When you say 'works' or 'not works,' I don't know where you're getting this from."
Dina Lohan is as defensive as Martin Short's tightly wound character Nathan Thurm. It's everybody else's fault. In just eight minutes, Dina blamed the "Hardball" judge, her ex-husband Michael, the tabloids, the paparazzi, L.A. - even the Internet. Guess it was some guy at Google who painted "F--- U" on Lindsay's fingernails just before her court appearance. Next, Dina will be blaming the middle-aged woman Lindsay was chasing in her car the night of her 2007 DUI bust for fleeing too fast.
Dina will simply not admit to her role in this, putting Lindsay - indeed, all four of her children - to work as models or actors or reality-show oddities. Lindsay was bringing home paychecks from 100 major commercial campaigns by the age of 10, when Dina switched her job to soap opera acting.
"I don't know what a stage mom is," Dina told Lauer yesterday. "I was an entertainer."
Now, with Lindsay looking frayed at 24 and not such a cash cow, Dina can't seem to figure out where it all went wrong. She doesn't smile; she bares porcelain. At least Michael Lohan admits there's a problem and his role in it. He told me yesterday, "Dina and I caused this and we need to fix it. Professionals have recommended that Linds needs family therapy with us, but Dina won't do it."
Dina purports that it's all part of a plan, that Lindsay's calamities fit into her philosophy of child rearing. "As a parent, you have to let them go a little bit," she said yesterday. "To live and fail and survive. Without failure, there's no success."
I shivered when she announced that Lindsay would probably get out of rehab early and they'd move back to New York. Then I howled with laughter when Dina uttered this gem: "She'll be focusing on charity ... and save the next victim of the tabloids." How? With ads saying, "You can save this celebutante with your donation ... or you can turn the page"?
How about this bit of philosophy, from Socrates: "The unexamined life is not worth living."
If Dina Lohan really wants to save her talented daughter's life, she should look in the mirror. And not to adjust her false eyelashes
Jacked from NY Daily News
2 comments:
It's been made very clear and simple that ms. Lohan is also a drug user herself. what's wrong with a little coke up the nose, a few meth hits to the veins, or just a few legal meds to calm the nerves. the woman is trash just like her daughter. Her mother is a trainwreck who should have never been allowed to have kids.
Poor Lindsey. Her parents are nuts.
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